Post by Kelli on Jul 9, 2009 18:16:15 GMT -5
(be kind, I wrote it many many years ago)
“Another Disappointment”
Kelli Zielinski (Candidate Riordis)
24.12.05
Riordis held her breath as the last dragonet poked her head from her shell, and rolled out onto the hot sands. Her dark green hide shined wetly, and she stood unsteadily to her feet, casting around with large eyes for the one that would be her lifemate. Creeling helplessly, she stumbled around, tripping over her wings, definitely in search of something. As the little green headed in her general direction, Riordis dared hope for just a moment that the green was finding it’s way to her. Her hazel eyes followed the dragonet’s path as the newborn dragon found it’s way closer and closer to where she stood.
It took every bit of her self control to not call out to the hatchling. She often felt it gave her an unfair advantage that she could hear them, although it sometimes was her greatest pain. During the hatching, with so many dragons in one place, she could hear them all at once- all dragons above as well as all the hatchlings. The hatchlings were the hardest, because their thoughts as they called out were confused, and not very focused as they cast around for a lifemate. Riordis could feel each one touch her mind as it searched… and pass on.
Please, please pick me, little dragon, she urged to herself, wringing her hands together nervously. She knew her mother was watching. She knew Chani was watching. The moment she had been wait for the last four turns might actually be coming true…
The dragon came closer and closer, and Riordis was just making the decision to help the stumbling creature when the green suddenly veered to her chosen rider, a young man whom Riordis recognized as Chayan. Her heart sunk, falling heavily in her chest as Chayan fell to his knees in the sand beside the green.
“Her name is Giseth!” Chayan- now Ch’yan, Riordis supposed- cried triumphantly as he threw his arms around the little green. Someone pushed a bowl of meat into Ch’yan’s sturdy hands, and he began feeding the tiny green to quell her cries of hunger. When she was reasonably sated, the pair stumbled after the other dragon and human pairs leaving the hatching grounds.
Trying hard to conceal her disappointment, Riordis let out the held breath and looked around her at the few candidates still left on the grounds, who immediately met up with one of the weyrlingmasters for post Hatching counseling. The weyrlingmaster second looked her way briefly, her eyes full of pity and a little bit of worry. She nodded once to Riordis, waving for her dismissal. They both knew Riordis didn’t need to be talked to about not Impressing. After four turns of standing on the hatching sands and walking away from them alone, Riordis knew how to handle it.
As well as I can handle it, anyway, Riordis thought, watching the Hatching grounds slowly clear of people. The families of the newly Impressed hurried to congratulate their families’ new dragonriders. The various dragons in the cavern sung in her head, although none spoke to her directly at the moment. The parents of the candidates who did not Impress carefully picked their way across the hot sands to offer consolation and encouragement to stand the next hatching, to come back home, to resume craft training, or even to pick up a craft. Trailing this group of people was a woman just a little taller than Riordis, with blonde hair that fell to the middle of her back. Her eyes, however, were the same hazel green that Riordis’ were. From beside her, a gray dog streaked to reach Riordis, his legs stretching long to reach her as fast as he could.
“Ah, Sebastian, my faithful companion!” she joked, kneeling down to greet the dog and scratch him behind the ears. Sebastian panted happily, gazing up at Riordis with bright eyes. She looked up to her mother, Sarina, and mustered a smile. “Guess I’m standing here again in a few months, Mother.” She hesitated, pushing back her dark hair over her ear and standing to meet her mother’s gaze evenly. “I hope you aren’t disappointed in me.”
It was like this every time Riordis had stood since her first time on the sands. She would greet Sebastian, then worry that her mother was disappointed. Just like every other time, Sarina laughed, hugging her daughter and holding her close. “We go through this every time you stand, don’t we?” she asked, backing away to regard Riordis at arm’s length. “Now, do you really think I’d be here for every single hatching you stand in if I didn’t believe totally in you?” she said sternly, her hand under Riordis’ chin and holding it firmly. “Your dragon has not hatched yet. Between you and me,” she said, winking, “I think you are destined for something special, my dear.” She tousled Riordis’ hair, then put an arm around her shoulder to guide her out of the hatching ground.
{{Do not leave without speaking to my rider,}} Sihayath called as she winged down from the upper terrace and towards the exit of the cavern.
Riordis sighed, shaking her head. {{Sihayath, now might not be the best time…}}
{{I think NOW is just the right time,}} Sihayath said firmly, as the great silver glided over her and out of the cavern.
Sarina arched an eyebrow, glancing at her daughter. “Is something wrong?”
Riordis smiled weakly, inclining her head to one side. “I think Chani wants to talk to me.”
Sarina nodded thoughtfully as they approached the exit to the monstrous cavern. Riordis noticed a slender rider leaning casually against the wall, arms crossed. Her dark hair was pulled back from her face, a few stray wisps falling on the sides of her face. She pushed herself firmly away from the wall, and moved to meet them. Smiling warmly, she reached out a hand to Riordis.
The candidate reached out to touch her hand in greeting. “I’m sorry,” Chani said as she clasped Riordis’ hand. “I was so certain you would Impress this time…”
Riordis shook her head, saying, “Don’t worry about it, Chani. I… really appreciate your support.” In her heart, though, Riordis hurt. Everyone had watched her fail yet again, and she couldn’t help but feel that acutely.
She admired Chani, wingleader of Silver Skies wing, and of all the riders at the weyr, was the one she didn’t want to let down. Chani, who had sensed this, had done her best to be sure that she encouraged Riordis, a thing that Riordis appreciated. It was likely she would have gone home long ago, but Chani had convinced her to stay, with the help of her great silver, Sihayath. The silver female seemed convinced that Riordis WOULD Impress, and Riordis wasn’t sure how she could argue with a dragon, much less one of Sihayath’s massive size.
“I am going to worry about it, Riordis,” Chani said, placing a hand on the girl’s shoulder and regarding her seriously. “I stood on the sands not even a turn and a half, and I was going sharding crazy by the time Sihayath choose me.” She spared a warm glace at the long, graceful silver, who had landed outside and waited for them. “It’s not easy; it wears you down, every time you watch the others who you’ve had classes with or gotten to know walk away. Now just you TRY to tell me that’s not hard!”
Riordis smiled sadly, shaking her head. “No, no, you’re right. It hurts like shards on bare feet every time I walk off those sands alone. I think the only thing keeping it from hurting worse is that I can at least talk to them.”
“Well, I have faith in you,” Chani said, with an encouraging smile. “So does Sihayath. And that speaks for a lot.”
Chani turned to Sarina, now clasping her hand. She had become familiar with the bakercrafter over the last turn or so, as Riordis had stood on the sands.
She looked outside, deciding that it wouldn’t be too cold to be outside for a few minutes, even with Riordis in her Candidate’s robe. “Shall we go for a walk?” Chani asked, looking from Sarina to Riordis. Mother and daughter nodded, and the three left the caverns.
Riordis sighed, looking from one to the other as Totoro frolicked around her feet. “I’m sorry for feeling so sorry for myself, it’s just that… well, I’ll be twenty-one turns in less than a handful of months, and I’m starting to worry that I won’t Impress while I’m still young enough to do so.”
Chani placed a reassuring hand on Riordis’ shoulder, smiling. “First of all, Riordis, you take this much too seriously. Impression either happens, or it doesn’t. And banging yourself up over it isn’t going to change that,” she scolded, removing her hand.
“Chani’s right, Rio,” Sarina said, shaking her hair from her face. “I mean, our family, other than your brother, B’dron, is not particularly included to Impress. However,” she said, raising a hand to forstall her daughter’s protests, “That hardly means anything. But I want you to remember that you’re much more than a dragon, to all of us.”
“And,” Chani added, as they headed for the weyr lake and away from the hatchlings and their chosen mates, “You have to remember that all dragons are different. The right one will find you, you’ll see.”
Riordis smiled, looking from one to the other. “I sure hope so, Chani.” She glanced back towards the weyr, and tugged idly at her Candidate robe. “Well,” she declared, “I should probably get back to the weyr and get out of this robe. I’m supposed to help out with the evening meal tonight. I even get to help cook a bit tonight.” She beamed, rather proud of that accomplishment. “Lauria’s been wonderful about finding me things that I enjoy.”
“Well THAT’S good!” Sarina said, laughing. “I know what happens when you get bored, my dear!”
“Aw Mother…” Riordis rolled her eyes, which just evoked more laughter from Sarina and Chani. After a moment, Riordis joined in. “So shards, I don’t do boredom well!”
Sarina shooed at her daughter. “Off with you now before you get in trouble!”
Riordis grinned and ran back to the weyr, her white robe flapping behind her as her feet pounded along on the ground.
Chani watched her go until she disappeared into the weyr. “She’ll be just fine,” she said quietly. “No matter what happens to her, she’s going to do just fine.” She turned to Sarina. “Has she considered what she’ll do if she doesn’t Impress?”
Sarina sighed heavily, scuffing her boot in the dirt. “I’m not sure she has. She’s taken this all very well, but because she can hear them all the time-“
“It’s already become a part of her?” Chani finished, guessing the rest.
“Well, yes,” Sarina said, nodding her head. “She’s aware that it doesn’t make her a choice for sure, but I think in her heart she can’t imagine any other possibility.”
Chani smiled slightly, glancing at the hatchlings nearby. “She wouldn’t be the first, Sarina, and she definitely won’t be the last to put all their hopes on this. But even so, it helps most Candidates to consider what they will do if they do not Impress.”
“While I don’t think she’s thought about it much,” Sarina confessed, “I think she’d have a few options. She loves to cook, and I know it makes her happy to do so. I think that might be something that runs in the family,” she added, with a smile. Sarina was a Journeywoman Baker. “But I know her, she’d have to stay in the weyr. She’d have to stay around dragons.”
Chuckling, Chani nodded. “We’ve all noticed her skill there. She must have had a good teacher.” She winked at Sarina, who smiled modestly. “Another possibility might be for her to be an assistant to the dragonhealers,” Chani offered, continuing. “She’d be able to help calm dragons down and find out where they hurt and what was wrong.”
Sarina looked at her, a smile spreading on her face. “That would probably be a good thing for her to consider either way, actually. Perhaps I’ll mention it to her at some point.”
“Do that. It might help. In the meantime, she’s still got some time to keep Standing.” Suddenly, they both heard the bell clang, announcing dinner. “I think that’s our cue,” Chani said, gesturing towards the Weyr. “Shall we go join the feast?”
With a nod, Sarina agreed as they started towards the weyr. Her daughter might not Impress- but no matter what happened to her, she’d have a place at Telgar Weyr.
END
“Another Disappointment”
Kelli Zielinski (Candidate Riordis)
24.12.05
Riordis held her breath as the last dragonet poked her head from her shell, and rolled out onto the hot sands. Her dark green hide shined wetly, and she stood unsteadily to her feet, casting around with large eyes for the one that would be her lifemate. Creeling helplessly, she stumbled around, tripping over her wings, definitely in search of something. As the little green headed in her general direction, Riordis dared hope for just a moment that the green was finding it’s way to her. Her hazel eyes followed the dragonet’s path as the newborn dragon found it’s way closer and closer to where she stood.
It took every bit of her self control to not call out to the hatchling. She often felt it gave her an unfair advantage that she could hear them, although it sometimes was her greatest pain. During the hatching, with so many dragons in one place, she could hear them all at once- all dragons above as well as all the hatchlings. The hatchlings were the hardest, because their thoughts as they called out were confused, and not very focused as they cast around for a lifemate. Riordis could feel each one touch her mind as it searched… and pass on.
Please, please pick me, little dragon, she urged to herself, wringing her hands together nervously. She knew her mother was watching. She knew Chani was watching. The moment she had been wait for the last four turns might actually be coming true…
The dragon came closer and closer, and Riordis was just making the decision to help the stumbling creature when the green suddenly veered to her chosen rider, a young man whom Riordis recognized as Chayan. Her heart sunk, falling heavily in her chest as Chayan fell to his knees in the sand beside the green.
“Her name is Giseth!” Chayan- now Ch’yan, Riordis supposed- cried triumphantly as he threw his arms around the little green. Someone pushed a bowl of meat into Ch’yan’s sturdy hands, and he began feeding the tiny green to quell her cries of hunger. When she was reasonably sated, the pair stumbled after the other dragon and human pairs leaving the hatching grounds.
Trying hard to conceal her disappointment, Riordis let out the held breath and looked around her at the few candidates still left on the grounds, who immediately met up with one of the weyrlingmasters for post Hatching counseling. The weyrlingmaster second looked her way briefly, her eyes full of pity and a little bit of worry. She nodded once to Riordis, waving for her dismissal. They both knew Riordis didn’t need to be talked to about not Impressing. After four turns of standing on the hatching sands and walking away from them alone, Riordis knew how to handle it.
As well as I can handle it, anyway, Riordis thought, watching the Hatching grounds slowly clear of people. The families of the newly Impressed hurried to congratulate their families’ new dragonriders. The various dragons in the cavern sung in her head, although none spoke to her directly at the moment. The parents of the candidates who did not Impress carefully picked their way across the hot sands to offer consolation and encouragement to stand the next hatching, to come back home, to resume craft training, or even to pick up a craft. Trailing this group of people was a woman just a little taller than Riordis, with blonde hair that fell to the middle of her back. Her eyes, however, were the same hazel green that Riordis’ were. From beside her, a gray dog streaked to reach Riordis, his legs stretching long to reach her as fast as he could.
“Ah, Sebastian, my faithful companion!” she joked, kneeling down to greet the dog and scratch him behind the ears. Sebastian panted happily, gazing up at Riordis with bright eyes. She looked up to her mother, Sarina, and mustered a smile. “Guess I’m standing here again in a few months, Mother.” She hesitated, pushing back her dark hair over her ear and standing to meet her mother’s gaze evenly. “I hope you aren’t disappointed in me.”
It was like this every time Riordis had stood since her first time on the sands. She would greet Sebastian, then worry that her mother was disappointed. Just like every other time, Sarina laughed, hugging her daughter and holding her close. “We go through this every time you stand, don’t we?” she asked, backing away to regard Riordis at arm’s length. “Now, do you really think I’d be here for every single hatching you stand in if I didn’t believe totally in you?” she said sternly, her hand under Riordis’ chin and holding it firmly. “Your dragon has not hatched yet. Between you and me,” she said, winking, “I think you are destined for something special, my dear.” She tousled Riordis’ hair, then put an arm around her shoulder to guide her out of the hatching ground.
{{Do not leave without speaking to my rider,}} Sihayath called as she winged down from the upper terrace and towards the exit of the cavern.
Riordis sighed, shaking her head. {{Sihayath, now might not be the best time…}}
{{I think NOW is just the right time,}} Sihayath said firmly, as the great silver glided over her and out of the cavern.
Sarina arched an eyebrow, glancing at her daughter. “Is something wrong?”
Riordis smiled weakly, inclining her head to one side. “I think Chani wants to talk to me.”
Sarina nodded thoughtfully as they approached the exit to the monstrous cavern. Riordis noticed a slender rider leaning casually against the wall, arms crossed. Her dark hair was pulled back from her face, a few stray wisps falling on the sides of her face. She pushed herself firmly away from the wall, and moved to meet them. Smiling warmly, she reached out a hand to Riordis.
The candidate reached out to touch her hand in greeting. “I’m sorry,” Chani said as she clasped Riordis’ hand. “I was so certain you would Impress this time…”
Riordis shook her head, saying, “Don’t worry about it, Chani. I… really appreciate your support.” In her heart, though, Riordis hurt. Everyone had watched her fail yet again, and she couldn’t help but feel that acutely.
She admired Chani, wingleader of Silver Skies wing, and of all the riders at the weyr, was the one she didn’t want to let down. Chani, who had sensed this, had done her best to be sure that she encouraged Riordis, a thing that Riordis appreciated. It was likely she would have gone home long ago, but Chani had convinced her to stay, with the help of her great silver, Sihayath. The silver female seemed convinced that Riordis WOULD Impress, and Riordis wasn’t sure how she could argue with a dragon, much less one of Sihayath’s massive size.
“I am going to worry about it, Riordis,” Chani said, placing a hand on the girl’s shoulder and regarding her seriously. “I stood on the sands not even a turn and a half, and I was going sharding crazy by the time Sihayath choose me.” She spared a warm glace at the long, graceful silver, who had landed outside and waited for them. “It’s not easy; it wears you down, every time you watch the others who you’ve had classes with or gotten to know walk away. Now just you TRY to tell me that’s not hard!”
Riordis smiled sadly, shaking her head. “No, no, you’re right. It hurts like shards on bare feet every time I walk off those sands alone. I think the only thing keeping it from hurting worse is that I can at least talk to them.”
“Well, I have faith in you,” Chani said, with an encouraging smile. “So does Sihayath. And that speaks for a lot.”
Chani turned to Sarina, now clasping her hand. She had become familiar with the bakercrafter over the last turn or so, as Riordis had stood on the sands.
She looked outside, deciding that it wouldn’t be too cold to be outside for a few minutes, even with Riordis in her Candidate’s robe. “Shall we go for a walk?” Chani asked, looking from Sarina to Riordis. Mother and daughter nodded, and the three left the caverns.
Riordis sighed, looking from one to the other as Totoro frolicked around her feet. “I’m sorry for feeling so sorry for myself, it’s just that… well, I’ll be twenty-one turns in less than a handful of months, and I’m starting to worry that I won’t Impress while I’m still young enough to do so.”
Chani placed a reassuring hand on Riordis’ shoulder, smiling. “First of all, Riordis, you take this much too seriously. Impression either happens, or it doesn’t. And banging yourself up over it isn’t going to change that,” she scolded, removing her hand.
“Chani’s right, Rio,” Sarina said, shaking her hair from her face. “I mean, our family, other than your brother, B’dron, is not particularly included to Impress. However,” she said, raising a hand to forstall her daughter’s protests, “That hardly means anything. But I want you to remember that you’re much more than a dragon, to all of us.”
“And,” Chani added, as they headed for the weyr lake and away from the hatchlings and their chosen mates, “You have to remember that all dragons are different. The right one will find you, you’ll see.”
Riordis smiled, looking from one to the other. “I sure hope so, Chani.” She glanced back towards the weyr, and tugged idly at her Candidate robe. “Well,” she declared, “I should probably get back to the weyr and get out of this robe. I’m supposed to help out with the evening meal tonight. I even get to help cook a bit tonight.” She beamed, rather proud of that accomplishment. “Lauria’s been wonderful about finding me things that I enjoy.”
“Well THAT’S good!” Sarina said, laughing. “I know what happens when you get bored, my dear!”
“Aw Mother…” Riordis rolled her eyes, which just evoked more laughter from Sarina and Chani. After a moment, Riordis joined in. “So shards, I don’t do boredom well!”
Sarina shooed at her daughter. “Off with you now before you get in trouble!”
Riordis grinned and ran back to the weyr, her white robe flapping behind her as her feet pounded along on the ground.
Chani watched her go until she disappeared into the weyr. “She’ll be just fine,” she said quietly. “No matter what happens to her, she’s going to do just fine.” She turned to Sarina. “Has she considered what she’ll do if she doesn’t Impress?”
Sarina sighed heavily, scuffing her boot in the dirt. “I’m not sure she has. She’s taken this all very well, but because she can hear them all the time-“
“It’s already become a part of her?” Chani finished, guessing the rest.
“Well, yes,” Sarina said, nodding her head. “She’s aware that it doesn’t make her a choice for sure, but I think in her heart she can’t imagine any other possibility.”
Chani smiled slightly, glancing at the hatchlings nearby. “She wouldn’t be the first, Sarina, and she definitely won’t be the last to put all their hopes on this. But even so, it helps most Candidates to consider what they will do if they do not Impress.”
“While I don’t think she’s thought about it much,” Sarina confessed, “I think she’d have a few options. She loves to cook, and I know it makes her happy to do so. I think that might be something that runs in the family,” she added, with a smile. Sarina was a Journeywoman Baker. “But I know her, she’d have to stay in the weyr. She’d have to stay around dragons.”
Chuckling, Chani nodded. “We’ve all noticed her skill there. She must have had a good teacher.” She winked at Sarina, who smiled modestly. “Another possibility might be for her to be an assistant to the dragonhealers,” Chani offered, continuing. “She’d be able to help calm dragons down and find out where they hurt and what was wrong.”
Sarina looked at her, a smile spreading on her face. “That would probably be a good thing for her to consider either way, actually. Perhaps I’ll mention it to her at some point.”
“Do that. It might help. In the meantime, she’s still got some time to keep Standing.” Suddenly, they both heard the bell clang, announcing dinner. “I think that’s our cue,” Chani said, gesturing towards the Weyr. “Shall we go join the feast?”
With a nod, Sarina agreed as they started towards the weyr. Her daughter might not Impress- but no matter what happened to her, she’d have a place at Telgar Weyr.
END
